My mom will be 83 years old this year. Anyone who knows my mom, knows she is one strong woman–she had to be! As a single parent with 4 kids, she had to be strong and responsible. It seems she never missed a beat.
It’s no surprise that us Jeter women are all very strong, assertive, and independent, we learned from the best! Lately though, I’ve found myself wanting to be a bit less assertive–somewhat more yielding and accepting.
Women’s liberation was big when I was growing up. I remember the Helen Reddy song, “I am strong, I am invincible, I am woman!” It seems like most of the women in my life have that strength. Women tend to be very strong by nature–able to endure so much life experience.
What is my point? Well, wouldn’t it be nice if we could just lighten up a bit. Wouldn’t it feel good to let go and just let things happen without always being in control, being right and being responsible? This goes for all you new moms out there too, sometimes it’s okay to let your man do the chores–even if he doesn’t do it quite the way you’re accustomed to (the right way), just let go! Sometimes it’s okay to let someone else do it the way they do it–not the way YOU do it!
I find myself withdrawing from the relationships in my life where women are trying to control everything. If it’s not done the way they want it done, then it doesn’t seem like a pleasant experience. Sometimes I just want to just BE, it’s not fun to be controlled–by myself or anyone else.
This is what brings my attention to this topic. Perhaps I’ve been too controlling. Perhaps I’ve been wanting to always be right. Perhaps I am always looking for it to be a certain way. All the lessons we learn out here are about ourselves but they’re through the others in our midst. We are reflections of one another.
After all these years of living life, my mom is starting to let go. As the years have gone on, I’ve noticed bit by bit a sense of letting go and just letting it be okay. She stopped clinging to ideals or things or certain ways that it had to look a long time ago. Most people who know my mom know her as a calm and beautiful presence.
My mom is who I want to be now. Easy, calm, accepting, considerate, empathetic, and as a brilliant poet once wrote about her, “full of grace, when others would act a fool”.
Let it be known, I am letting it go and letting it flow. Yes, there will be times that I forget and feel the intensity of my old ways trying to grip me and snap back in to control a situation. I will simply notice, be aware, then let it go. Go with the flow is feeling like a nice way to be.
8 thoughts on “Lessons In Time”
An important message and something we need to remind ourselves of. Looking back at my own experiences, I realize that I was most content when I went with the flow and accepted things as is. Often, though, I did not and it did absolutely no good.
Thank you, Tara, for reminding me of this.
Well spoken Tara, “full of grace, when others act the fool” is an apt description. Your Mom is truly one of the strongest women in my life and one I turned to often for advice when my own mom wasn’t available. One can only aspire to her wisdom
Thanks Kandy, I feel so fortunate to call her “mom!”
Reblogged this on Hiking Los Angeles, Malibu, Santa Monica Mountains and commented:
What a beautiful tribute to your mom…..she sounds like an amazing
woman. You are blessed to have her in your life!
Thank you! Yes, she is an extraordinary woman. Thanks so much for reading!
Keep um coming Tara…being it comes from the heart it’s real
which makes it great reading for everyone, especially me!
Thanks Johnny, that helps me. I really did just start writing to get it all out of my head but if others can benefit and find value in my words, well then, they’ve got lots of blog posts to read. So many of my postings go unnoticed since I don’t really know how to build an audience and work the marketing end of things. The writing itself has been enough of a reward for now I guess. Thanks again, I appreciate your words of encouragement.