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Envy in Malibu

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I have the privilege and honor of caring for people’s homes and animals while they are away.  One of the questions people always ask me is:

“Do you ever become jealous or envious when  caring for other people’s homes?Do you go into the comparison mode and wish you had more of this wealth and abundance.”

Am I envious? Absolutely not! Sure, there are times my mind wanders into that lower energy place of lack and feelings of unworthiness, but my work is to guide it back to the light.

Right now I feel like I’m on the set of  “Under The Tuscan Sun.”  I feel so fortunate to be in this space.  I admire the beauty of it all and I enjoy the responsibility while I’m here but I also enjoy the freedom of my regular life when I’m at home.JacksonsCastle

This will sound bazaar to most, but I never really wanted the responsibility of owning my own home.  I wanted to feel free to go anywhere in the world without being tied down by the physical responsibility of a house.  What can I say, I was young and that’s how I felt.  Now, that’s exactly where I’m at in my life today.

I live in an “out of the ordinary” environment and one of my living spaces resembles a log cabin.  Interestingly, a log cabin is also what I once dreamed of living in.IMG_0244

 Today, though, I’m here in Malibu– enjoying this blissful space and reaping the rewards within right now.  The rewards really are within! And the rewards really are right now!

 

The question really isn’t “what can I get”, the question is “what can I let”–what can I let into my soul that will bring me joy and peace and beauty and ease.  I don’t have to GET anything to feel those feelings.

Feelings transport me into  a high-flying place where bliss is all I see and hear and feel.  Beautiful chimes mixed in with the sound of real raw wind whipping through the palm trees and a fountain dripping below.  I sit and watch and feel the beauty within and there is something so simple about that. All power is in the present moment and I am anchored in the here and now.Blessings

When all is said and done, I remember my favorite quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson: “Envy is ignorance and imitation is suicide.”

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California–Letting The Dream Go

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I remember my second visit to California, I was 18 years old and loving this place!  Near the end of my trip, I read some graffiti on a freeway overpass, “Tourists GO HOME”! 

I remember feeling really bad when I read it, almost like I had been personally attacked.

I couldn’t understand how someone would want me to go home.  I thought to myself, “gosh if I lived here, I would want to meet all the people that came from all over the world to visit”.  That’s just how I am, I love finding out about people.MeetupPhoto

I’m still the same way all these years later, if I meet somebody new I want to know all about them.  I’ve lived in this state for 21 years now and I feel as if I was born here.  I wasn’t born here, but I did live here when I was a baby and I feel as if California is in my bones.  I love this place, it is so magnificent!

Where else can you go to the beach then take a 2 to 5 hour drive and be in the mountains with snow?  Everywhere I go here, I feel at home.

California!  I’ve been up and down the coast and everywhere I go is total bliss.  It really is no wonder that people want to visit here, let alone move here.  If you knew what we had to endure in Michigan, you would have a heart and be okay with us being here.  While it is true, there are lots of people and cars, how can you blame them all?  This a a gorgeous place!

I remember one of the women at the gym complaining about all the cars flooding from the valley to go to the beach.  She said, “vals, go home, we don’t want you here”. 

It’s funny, I thought to myself, she moved here from Ontario Canada–who is she to talk?  Vals are the people who live in the San Fernando Valley.  It is a good 15-25 degrees hotter than on the beach.  Gosh, they deserve to enjoy the beach.  I can see it from both sides, though.  When I spend most of my time up and down the coast because I work in Malibu and live in Brentwood, there can be a huge amount of traffic in the summer months because of everyone flooding to the beach.  It’s all good though, we’re just enjoying where we get to live and play!taraonpaseo

I enjoy where I live and play every day.  Today, as I drove the stretch of PCH that takes me to my long time place of work, The Malibu Gym, I marveled at the beauty of Point Dume’ in the distance.

Honestly, I don’t think there has been one day in the 21 years I’ve been driving that coast that I haven’t been in awe of the sight of it when I see it. IMG_0785

I do wonder, how is it possible to love a place so much?

The month of June, 2013 marks 22 years of living in California.  From the age of 10, I spent 20 years dreaming of living in California.

Some might say it became everything I focused upon.

The DJ in the college cafeteria only had to see me and know that it was time to play my song, “California Dreamin”.  Class after class of teaching, I always ended in the relaxed visualizing mode and saw myself here, happy and vibrant!  Then, after years of postponing my move either because of school or a job or a boyfriend,  I made it happen.  I had dreamed and visualized and listened and dreamed some more and then I moved to California.

I had no car, no job, no place to live–I just had to be here once and for all.

So many dreams came true for me.  I lived on a private horse ranch and attended horse clinics to learn how to be confident in riding and dealing with horses–my childhood dream come true!

Today, I am surrounded by health food stores, healthy restaurants,  nature abounding everywhere I turn, near perfect weather, people I adore and so much more!

I love the life I’ve created.  I ride my bike, I hike the trails, practice yoga at my choice of a plethora of studios.  I live in a neighborhood that simply must be one of the prettiest in the country.  fuscia flowersAbundance surrounds me in every direction I turn.  I am worthy of it all because I brought it to life with my visions and my strong desire.

Now, after 22 years of fully embracing and loving this place, I had the thought of letting it go.

Let it go and move onto something different.  I am open to that.  Montana seems to be pulsing in my radar these days.  Colorado is another place calling to me although the thought of the Winter months don’t really appeal to me.   Hawaii could work for me.  Wyoming is a mystery to me still. Or, I could stay here and just keep living it in the blissful fashion I’ve carved out for myself.

The feeling I had, though, when I let go of the need to be here and the need to stay here was so freeing.  pacific palisades hike

By letting go, we simply surrender to either something better or keeping that which we have.  It was obvious I had been clinging to being here.  I could feel such a total sense of freedom when I just let go.

Who knows what tomorrow will bring? “I am open to everything and attached to nothing”.  That sounds like a good plan.  I heard Dr. Wayne Dyer say it many years ago and until you experience it in one area of life, you won’t really know how good it feels.

I am feeling this way in several areas of life and it feels like a dream–as  good as the California dream I had all those years ago!purple passion point dume

You Live You Learn

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I spend lots of time with  amazing women.

Most of them are younger than me and some of my best friends are as much as 20 years younger than me.

Lately, I’ve caught myself thinking, “gosh, she is so aware and enlightened for her age”.  Sometimes I feel like they are so far ahead of me than I was at their age.

As I’ve thought more about this, I realize that I was on that track when I was their age.  The only difference there is between us is life experience.

That’s what I love about getting older, I am getting more and more with every passing day.  The more life I get to live, the more life I get to live.

Sometimes we forget how far we’ve come and how great we were, even all those years ago.  I was fabulous then and I am fabulous NOW.

I remember when I was a bit younger than these women, I read the book, “You Can Have It All” by Arnold Patent.  It had such an affect on me and I will always remember some of the quotes that I couldn’t help but memorize…

“Our bodies are extraordinary instruments with literally unlimited potential, whatever we believe they are capable of doing, they can do.  We limit them with our limited thoughts about their capabilities”.

And the other thought changing quote that stands out for me,

“We create our lives with our thoughts and since there’s no limit to what we can think, there’s no limit to what our life experiences can be”.

Another great book that I read nearer the beginning of my path was, “The Power of Your Subconscious Mind” by Joseph Murphy.  The stories of power moved me more than I can express.

Then there was “Psycho Cybernetics” by Maxwell Maltz.

Let’s not forget “Love, Medicine, and Miracles” by Bernie Siegel.  It was a powerful introduction into the world of Psychoneuroimmunology.

Psychoneuroimmunology is the study of how our thoughts can affect our healing.  These books inspired me to study Sports Psychology and earn my Masters Degree.

Sports Psychology is using mental techniques to enhance performance.  The good news has always been, this is not limited to sports, it can be used daily in our lives to alter our life experiences.

One of the best speakers I’ve ever heard is Donald Trump.  I know, some people have a hard time with Donald Trump, he is controversial.  I have had the pleasure, though, of hearing him speak on a couple different occasions.

He is amazing because of his life experience.  He tells some great stories because he has lived life.

There is something so comforting about this…he has lived life.  He has failed and succeeded and failed some more.  I’m sure he was alert and aware at 28 and now he is still alert and aware– he just has more experience that adds to the richness of life and to the wonder of his storytelling.

Dr. Wayne Dyer is another great storyteller.  I’ve seen him evolve throughout my own years of growth.  He is living and experiencing life and he just keeps expanding in his life and in his teachings.

Honestly, I could sit for hours unending listening to the stories he weaves in with his teaching!

Age is not something that freaks me out or brings me down, it just IS.  It doesn’t define me or limit me in any way.  If anything, it has served me with valuable lessons that lift me to the next level as my time here in this realm evolves.

I surround myself with people who see me for me and they don’t judge me by my chronological age.  They embrace me and accept me as an individual who just keeps growing right along with the whole of life.  Experience is living and the more years I’m able to live and learn, the better.

I am just so impressed with the women in my life– I love watching them grow, learn and evolve.  They teach me and inspire me on the path they’re on.

Age means nothing because our lives are shaped by our willingness to learn, expand, and ultimately transcend time. 

I’m not a number that is limited,  I am an infinite expression of life…and so are YOU.  

The Life You Envisioned?

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Is your life everything you envisioned it to be?  This is a question someone asked me the other day.  My guess is he was looking at my life and wondering how I could possibly be happy.

I admit, I am a woman and I do think too much, but I was left feeling a little defensive and it made me really look at my life and wonder.

The answer was quite clear today as I rode my bike along the 25  mile stretch of bike path from Pacific Palisades to Palos Verdes.

I am living something I envisioned for many years.  Since the age of 10, I have wanted to live in Southern California.  I grew up in Michigan and did not entirely enjoy the weather or the lifestyle.

I never seemed to fit in.

The winter weather was harsh and the summers were way too short.  I spent most of my adult years hanging out in fruit markets or the couple of health food stores that existed then.   In the summertime, I tried to ride my bike as much as possible.  I rode to work and on my days off I rode along Edward Hines Drive…a long, lovely stretch of highway with parks all along.

The fact is, I love to play, move my body and be outside.  I have envisioned the life I’m living for many years and I AM living it now!

In college (while still in Michigan), there was a cafeteria that pumped music inside.  Everyday, I stopped into the DJ and requested my one and only song.

All he had to do is see my face to know it was time to play, “California Dreamin”.  I was 18 years old and the dream was strong.

Colleges and Universities kept me in Michigan.  If I wasn’t in college, it was a job or a boyfriend that seemed to tie me to that state.  I started to wonder if I would ever make it out of Michigan?

I taught Aerobic Fitness classes and at the end of every class I played some relaxation music and had my students (and myself) lie on their backs and visualize a place they wanted to be.

I had a couple of favorite songs I used for this segment of class but the best was “Summer” by War.  Interestingly, years later I identified one of the lyrics that I had never really heard clearly before… “from Atlantic City to out in Malibu or anywhere between I’m telling you when you feel those balmy breezes on your face, Summertime is the best time anyplace”. 

I had heard the part about the balmy breezes, but  Malibu didn’t come clear to me until many years later.

When my husband and I sold everything we owned and drove someone’s car out (the day after we received our Masters Degree), the first place we lived was Malibu!

The lyrics in the song brought me to Malibu…what are the chances of that?  We moved without having a car, a job, or a place to live.  We wound up in a most magical place that is still home to me.

We carved out a life for ourselves that went right along with what we envisioned.  We were active, working out in the gym and enjoying the nature abounding all around us…hiking, mountain biking, and horseback riding.

We lived in Malibu  on a private horse ranch.

One of my biggest dreams as a girl was to learn to ride and spend loads of time with horses. That happened for me as well. 

My landlord took me to riding clinics and taught me everything I could want to know about horses.  I bonded with a special horse and felt an intense amount of love and sensitivity.

Another long time dream–I met one of my bodybuilding heroes at the gym I work at.  For years, while still living in Michigan, I devoured every magazine article I could find about her–I adored her.  Then, one day, she was being introduced to me at The Malibu Gym–my workplace!

Today, I looked to my right and the waves were crashing, then I looked to my left and was awestruck by the snow capped mountains in the distance.

In my visualizations at the end of those aerobic classes,  I always saw myself living in a place with the ocean on one side and the mountains on the other.  I was vibrant and healthy and happy.

A good many years have passed–things have changed and my former husband and I have gone in different directions.  For the last 6 years, I live on my own–sort of.  This is probably why the question was asked from the man who asked.

Ron is a visitor of Will who lives in the guesthouse on the property that I have my office.  I live in the main house with a woman.  I have my own bedroom/bathroom and entrance.

My office, however, is out beyond the pool across from Will’s guesthouse.  Will’s visitor sees me “wandering about” as he calls it (he’s Australian).  My office beyond the pool is a 1 room building lodged up against the mountainside.  There isn’t a bathroom so I need to walk up the stairs to the main house if I need to use the bathroom.

I guess, to the onlooker, this doesn’t look all that glamorous and one would think that a woman my age would be established and living alone in a place where there were bathrooms to use without hiking all over the property.

I can only surmise that his interpretation of my life is that I am not happy with where things are.

Oh, I’m sure I could have more and be more and thrive more, but I embrace where I am. Almost all I envisioned came true for me.

In my eyes I have everything I need and there’s always something we could complain about.  And yes, I am envisioning new desires…I certainly haven’t stopped envisioning my life.

There are new orders I have placed with the Universe and until they arrive, I will be happy with my life NOW.

But, to answer the question, “is your life everything you envisioned it to be”?  Yes, indeed it is.  It is richer and warmer and more wonderful than I envisioned it.  So many dreams have come true…
My life is everything I envisioned and more.  Experiences, relationships, and places are the wonder all around me.

I live in bliss on a daily basis. 

From your perspective or Ron’s perspective it may not look that great, but this is my life,  I am happy,  I am fulfilled and I am so glad I know that this is the life I have envisioned and the life I AM envisioning is coming into existence as I write!!!