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Their View Mirror

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I have noticed something that I just keep getting clearer and clearer about it.  Every time I get down or go into a depression, it is almost always because I am viewing my life from someone else’s view of me.

To say it another way, I love my little life.  I live in a funky environment that is rare and doesn’t necessarily FIT into what society views as normal.  I absolutely devour my nights at home and LOVE my living situation.

Yet, there are times that I find myself depressed.  Lately I’ve been able to pinpoint why–it’s because I’m viewing my life from THEIR view of me.TARAreflecting

People say things to me that are so inappropriate and with such pity aimed at me.   Please don’t pity me just because I’m not living the life that you would live!  I am me and you are you–please consider that when you judge!

When I view my life from within, I am blissful and happy.

When I look through THEIR eyes, I become that poor pitiful person they see me as.

Really, I ask you, why does it have to look a certain way?  Why do our lives have to conform to everybody else’s way of living or society’s view of what a successful existence is?  It doesn’t, and the clearer I get about this, the more I thrive in my own reality.

“The older you get, the more you understand how your conscience works.  The biggest and only critic lives in your perception of people’s perception of you rather than people’s perception of you.”
― Criss Jami

Brilliant!

So, when it all comes down to it, I AM in charge of my thoughts and feelings.  When I feel what people are perceiving my life to be, I don’t have to allow those perceptions to permeate my being.

Our lives are our own and when we embrace them with a sense of wholeness, we thrive.

As Emerson said, “Envy is ignorance and imitation is suicide.”  God I love that.

So, this I say to myself and to you if you care to receive it:   our lives are our own and we get to decide what we value and what feels good–nobody else.  I suppose it is easier said than done but with some introspection and breath work within, we can come to the place where it really is okay REGARDLESS of what THEY think!BrightLightLantern

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Their View Mirror

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I have noticed something that I just keep getting clearer and clearer about it.  Every time I get down or go into a depression, it is almost always because I am viewing my life from someone else’s view of me.

To say it another way, I love my little life.  I live in a funky environment that is rare and doesn’t necessarily FIT into what society views as normal.  I absolutely devour my nights at home and LOVE my living situation.

Yet, there are times that I find myself depressed.  Lately I’ve been able to pinpoint why–it’s because I’m viewing my life from THEIR view of me.TARAreflecting

People say things to me that are so inappropriate and with such pity aimed at me.   Please don’t pity me just because I’m not living the life that you would live!  I am me and you are you–please consider that when you judge!

When I view my life from within, I am blissful and happy.

When I look through THEIR eyes, I become that poor pitiful person they see me as.

Really, I ask you, why does it have to look a certain way?  Why do our lives have to conform to everybody else’s way of living or society’s view of what a successful existence is?  It doesn’t, and the clearer I get about this, the more I thrive in my own reality.

“The older you get, the more you understand how your conscience works.  The biggest and only critic lives in your perception of people’s perception of you rather than people’s perception of you.”
― Criss Jami

Brilliant!

So, when it all comes down to it, I AM in charge of my thoughts and feelings.  When I feel what people are perceiving my life to be, I don’t have to allow those perceptions to permeate my being.

Our lives are our own and when we embrace them with a sense of wholeness, we thrive.

As Emerson said, “Envy is ignorance and imitation is suicide.”  God I love that.

So, this I say to myself and to you if you care to receive it:   our lives are our own and we get to decide what we value and what feels good–nobody else.  I suppose it is easier said than done but with some introspection and breath work within, we can come to the place where it really is okay REGARDLESS of what THEY think!BrightLightLantern

Trash Talk

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I’m not really sure what to say.I’ve been hiking in these Malibu trails for 23 years. I am sad to say that the last couple of hikes on one of the sweetest trails in Malibu was so full of garbage that I vowed to bring a garbage bag for the next time I hiked it.

Sure enough, I got a load full of trash on this hike.

People come to these trails because they’ve read it as a recommended trail somewhere. The people who come are in search of a getaway from the city and I assume they revere the trails in a similar way that I do–just can’t seem to wrap my head around why they would be so careless with their trash?

Water bottles, cigarette butts, candy wrappers, and more.  Is it because they’ve never been taught not to litter?  Or is it that they just don’t care?

Whatever the reason, I have a hard time just walking by.

So, the next time you are out on one of our fabulous trails and you spot some garbage, please set an example and pick it up.  Perhaps others will follow your lead and we will no longer have people who disrespect such a beautiful place.Tara and the coastline

Time Passages!

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It’s a thrill to know that someone from over 30 years ago was thinking of me today, remembering me, speaking about me fondly. 

I got a message from one of my Facebook friends.  She is the daughter of my very first boss!

Tino, my boss who I haven’t been in touch with in almost 30 years, had some blinds installed in their home today.  As he and his wife talked to the young man who installed the blinds, he discovered that Tino was the co-owner of Howard’s Drugs in Livonia, MI.

That was the connecting fuse.  Paul ( a young man I dated briefly) knew me when I worked at Howard’s.

What’s very cool is, now I am going to be in touch with the very first boss I ever had!

For years, after leaving Howard’s to go out and explore new horizons,  I would always pop in every few months and just stay in touch.

It was hard to let those connections go!IMG_0508

Tino and Dennis (the Pharmacists and Co-Owners) were such a formidable part of  my growing up.  I started working there when I was 17.  I worked my way up as a cashier of the tobacco and candy counter  to the pharmacy where I worked for 6 years.  I learned a lot about life there in that pharmacy!

After several years of popping in and catching up though, they sold the store and there was something so sad and empty inside me–that I couldn’t go and see people that were once a part of my life, really a part of my growing up!  Home base.17yroldTara

Sometimes I feel that way about all of my past relationships.

Wouldn’t it be nice if we could  just “catch up” with everyone we ever knew and loved?  Well, maybe not everyone!

Facebook  has added a depth and richness to my life, we really are fortunate to live in this time–this would never have been relayed to me without my Facebook friend connection!

In his email reply,  hearing from me after all these years Tino said,  “I tell you I got just as excited as your old friend Paul– when he came running back in the house and said, “I was in love with Tara” and I said, “we all loved Tara.”  We both enjoyed the moment!

Think about it.  Life is  long.  We touch lots of lives and go through many stages and take all kinds of paths.  To hear that someone from all those years ago is remembering you, talking about you, wondering about you — makes you…transcendent!TaraPikeMarket

Can’t think of any other word to describe it.

I

You

We…

Transcend Time!

We go BEYOND the limits of time!tara-and-the-coastline.jpg

There’s just something so sweet about that.  Even though people are gone from our lives, they are still part of our lives and we are still part of theirs. Our soul is our home.

I’m not sure if it’s just that I’m a very reflective person or if it happens to everyone, but so many people pop into my conscious thoughts and memories.  Mostly just flashes, but it’s enough of a flash to be a thrill.

Yes,  I do believe I’m living my heaven on earth when I have those flashes–all the best characters of my life  visit me everyday.  Thank you!

Dilapidated Dreams

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Hiking Los Angeles, Malibu, Santa Monica Mountains

Have you ever driven by a business that was once thriving and now it is dilapidated because of neglect?  In your memory,  it was busy and successful– the place was always maintained with the utmost care and cleanliness; there were  customers bustling in and out  and it was alive and thriving.  Then, years later, you drive by to see an establishment that has been abandoned.

That’s what happened today when I drove by the old Chevron station in Malibu.  It is now infused with weeds, cracked cement, and an old wire fence surrounding it.  The sight of it just hit me really hard.

I guess what  moved me was that it can be a metaphor for our lives, our health, and our dreams.

Unfortunately, some people do this very thing with their  health–they just stop the upkeep.  They decide to just let it go and discontinue maintenance of the premises.

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Your Body–Friend or Foe?

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I massaged a woman yesterday who was so rushed and stressed and oh so attached to her pain!  She ran in complaining about the parking situation and she did not seem ready to lay down on a massage table and receive.

She is a former therapist at the clinic I work in so I knew her but I had never seen her in this state–

really rushed, stressed, and agitated.

Our previous time together was very limited–we’re simply acquaintances.

I must say, her energy and mine did not meet anywhere–even in the middle.

 I was calm and loving and seeing relaxation and calm and health and healing for her.IMG_0717

She was angry and stressed and frustrated and burdened with a chronic pain for 10 years.

She owned that pain like it was hers for good.  She claimed it and reaffirmed it and it was certainly not going to go anywhere–she made sure of that with her words and her emotions.

“I have had physical therapy, acupuncture, chiropractic, every kind of therapy and nothing even touches it–it’s just numb!”

I gave what I could as a massage therapist, but I know it was nothing near what she could receive.  Her energy is BLOCKED and she could not receive.  She couldn’t even breath, she was really and truly in a bad place.

Don’t get me wrong, I too have been attached to my ailments–searching and looking for ways to alleviate them.  Sometimes we have to look at our life though to find out what is really going on.

She was in no place to hear me, but I did ask her, “what happened 10 years ago when this began?” “Nothing, no injuries or accidents”.  “how about emotionally?”, I asked  She just affirmed,  without thinking–“Nothing”.

She isn’t ready to let it go.   Sometimes, the things that cause us the most pain just need to be let go.  Let it go.  Stop holding onto it so tight , claiming it–stop treating it as the enemy!

I remember when I first starting teaching Aerobics.

We all taught in jazz dance shoes and jumped around on cement and wood and carpet over cement.

I taught several classes per week and sometimes 2 or 3 per day.

I had SHIN SPLINTS!

I remember the nurturing spirit I had toward this injury.  I had a ledge to sit on in my shower.  I would massage my shins with the pulsating  beads of water.  I massaged and talked to my shins with love and sweetness.  After the shower, I massaged them with lotion telling them how much I appreciated their service.  That memory is so vivid–it’s as if it was yesterday but it was 30 years ago!

Yes, we need to treat ourselves and our injured body parts with love and kindness–not as the enemy!

Those shin splints went away pretty effortlessly–my body WAS serving me and responded to my loving suggestions of health and healing.

I wish that for you.  tara-and-the-coastline.jpg

In my morning meditation with Deepak Chopra today, he said the same, we need to treat our pain as a friend sitting next to us–“embrace her and comfort her.”   My body is my friend and I’m so glad I took the time to experience love and nurturing toward myself all those years ago because it just keeps on giving back as the years move forward!

Too Young To Learn From?

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I invited a friend to come with me to  yoga.  The teacher of the class is  20 years my junior.   When I invited him, he said,

“No, I won’t go to her class–what can I learn from her, she is too young.”the fabulous Brigitte

I sure am glad I didn’t have that attitude when I first met her years ago.  The moment I met her, I knew she was someone I wanted to spend time with–see previous post: (https://naturegirltara.wordpress.com/2010/04/30/a-magical-age-25/)

At the same time, I can understand his sentiment because I too have  held this belief at times. My belief was a bit scattered and depended on what the subject was.  Here I am, a woman who has already seen so much in life, experienced far more because of the extra years I’ve lived, yet–

I strive to find ways around that limiting belief–to stay open to as many people and paths I cross–regardless of their age.IMG_0795

Years ago even when Brigitte  had just begun teaching–I was simply going to be a support for her as a teacher. Yet, every time I attended her class, I always experienced some kind of  illumination that thrilled me.  It was always a loving, healing experience for me.  Brigitte will say a phrase that can tap you into your own spirit in an instant.  Her spirit and energy alone, are worth your time.

My personal yoga practice has been going on for about 15 years–just because someone is new to teaching doesn’t mean there aren’t  things I can learn from them!

Brigitte has been teaching for more than a few years now and as time has gone on, I see that I have learned more than I was even aware of at the time.  brigitte takes a breath

I still think about the interaction with the friend that is close to my age.  I can’t help but think of the confucius saying–“he who thinks he knows it all has a lot to learn”.  It’s not that he thinks he knows it all, it’s just that he thinks he knows more than her because she’s so much younger.

Don’t let those narrow-minded beliefs cut you off from amazing people that  just happen to be younger than you!

As I reflect on how Brigitte has affected my life, I’m pretty blown away at the things I’m doing today that she is responsible for.  She urged me to start writing this blog.  I vividly remember the day–we had just completed a gorgeous hike.  We sat together  and she helped me form my first words in my first post!  Who knows how long it would have taken me without her guidance.

When I met her, I had just ended a 20 year marriage that had me pretty darn isolated!

Brigitte has opened up my world in ways that were so necessary for my growth as a person and in my profession.   She really helped me to see the power of being involved in community and in creative collaborations of all kinds. I’ve since started my own Meetup.com hiking group and have met and remain friends with so many amazing people who I’ve met through that group.my meetup hike

Brigitte has organized and led workshops on various topics–one of my favorites was

The Artist’s Way Workshop.

A group of women met for 12 consecutive weeks practicing the  topics together as a  support system for one an other.  It was a powerful process and Brigitte is a myriad of things to me and to the people who know her–she is a nature lover, she seeks out adventure and wonder, and she is a master facilitator on so many topics regarding personal growth and finding ways to claim the life we were meant to live.  She has been invaluable to so many charities throughout Los Angeles  that empower children through creativity and the performing arts.IMG_0519

As a yoga teacher, Brigitte’s classes have always evolved.

She is the consummate professional–she has a sense about her and she knows how to address whatever your needs may be.

Emotionally, she has that same sense.  She can tap into what you may have locked away for years and get you looking at it and responding to it.

If you have the chance to attend a class here in the Santa Monica area or even travel with Brigitte to a far away yoga retreat–take it!

The chance for an intensive week of that “Gigi Yogini” energy should rock your world in ways you can’t even imagine now!brigitteandtaraTREE

 Visit http://www.GigiYogini.com for the latest schedules and updates.

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