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Envy in Malibu

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I have the privilege and honor of caring for people’s homes and animals while they are away.  One of the questions people always ask me is:

“Do you ever become jealous or envious when  caring for other people’s homes?Do you go into the comparison mode and wish you had more of this wealth and abundance.”

Am I envious? Absolutely not! Sure, there are times my mind wanders into that lower energy place of lack and feelings of unworthiness, but my work is to guide it back to the light.

Right now I feel like I’m on the set of  “Under The Tuscan Sun.”  I feel so fortunate to be in this space.  I admire the beauty of it all and I enjoy the responsibility while I’m here but I also enjoy the freedom of my regular life when I’m at home.JacksonsCastle

This will sound bazaar to most, but I never really wanted the responsibility of owning my own home.  I wanted to feel free to go anywhere in the world without being tied down by the physical responsibility of a house.  What can I say, I was young and that’s how I felt.  Now, that’s exactly where I’m at in my life today.

I live in an “out of the ordinary” environment and one of my living spaces resembles a log cabin.  Interestingly, a log cabin is also what I once dreamed of living in.IMG_0244

 Today, though, I’m here in Malibu– enjoying this blissful space and reaping the rewards within right now.  The rewards really are within! And the rewards really are right now!

 

The question really isn’t “what can I get”, the question is “what can I let”–what can I let into my soul that will bring me joy and peace and beauty and ease.  I don’t have to GET anything to feel those feelings.

Feelings transport me into  a high-flying place where bliss is all I see and hear and feel.  Beautiful chimes mixed in with the sound of real raw wind whipping through the palm trees and a fountain dripping below.  I sit and watch and feel the beauty within and there is something so simple about that. All power is in the present moment and I am anchored in the here and now.Blessings

When all is said and done, I remember my favorite quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson: “Envy is ignorance and imitation is suicide.”

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Feeling Freedom

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I’m having a hard time finding words for all of the feeling–I caught a glimpse of it this last week.  

I felt safe and secure, deeply safe and secure, yet all the indicators in the physical world would not convince you of my security.IMG_0146

I live week to week.    I have no savings account and I am deeper in debt than I care to convey.

Now, knowing that, you’d think I walk around in fear and doubt and worry all the time.  You’d think I cut up my credit cards and cut myself off from everything I want.

Wrong!

I enjoy life and try to live with total ease and joy–regardless of my financial situation.  Life is more than money–life is energy!

More important than the status of my financial books is the FEELING of freedom.  Freedom comes from feeling not from having.  

The soul wants to experience life it isn’t interested in accomplishments!

Yes, while there are times I yearn for a “real” job that pulls in “real” money, for the most part I am happy to be living this life I’m living.  I enjoy freedom and yes, even multiple streams of income.  Just when I think there is no more money to pay the bills, I get another check from an unexpected job and it always seems to arrive at the opportune time.

At the depth of this feeling, is pure knowing that everything will always be okay.  It always is.  Everything always works out for me.IMG_0492

 

As Donya Ture’ writes in her book, Free Falling Into Your Higher Self, “The logic behind your free fall into a new belief system is because you realize that there is no wordily explanation for life and therefore the impossible, the mystical or even the magical must actually be possible.”

Now, I’m clear that some will say I’m just an idiot and that I should be planning for my retirement and I should be planning to get out of debt and I should be planning to be wealthy.   Planning, planning, planning!

I say, “screw your plans.”  Life is truly about living  NOW.  Having said that,  it is true, I am simply soothing myself and the situation I am in rather than focusing on what’s wrong with it.  I have nothing against planning for the future.  I am happy though.

All of the warnings I receive feels like a fear based way of being.  I don’t want to feed the fear.

I want to bask in the feelings of enoughness, fullness, all that is– wellness!

So, that’s what I will do.  It will be challenging because of the world I live in.  Every way I turn, there will be more INFORMATION to remind me how irresponsible I’m being.  My work, no, my JOY will be to transcend those thought forms, those limiting beliefs and just BE.  I AM WAKING UP from the reality that I have created in the past.  Glimpses of awakening are soooooooo sweet!

Life is so full.  It’s full of a vastness that, once experienced, is irresistible and intoxicating.  I want to spend more time there!IMG_1167

The sweetest twist of all of this are the experiences that show up.  The more I anchor myself in this knowing, the more opportunities arise–they already have!  This is a vibrational Universe, when you raise your vibration by looking for beauty, finding ways to appreciate and have gratitude for the wonders around you, those feelings will draw similar experiences to you.  And who knows, maybe in the form of money!  Money IS energy and it’s always circulating in my midst.

No, I don’t chase money any longer.  Instead I chase the present moment where everything thrives if we will allow it.

 

Money is NOT the source of happiness.  Freedom does not come from having money, BUT having money may just come from feeling FREEDOM!

GodCare

 

I BELIEVE.  I TRUST.  I LET GO. 

 

 

Too Young To Learn From?

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I invited a friend to come with me to  yoga.  The teacher of the class is  20 years my junior.   When I invited him, he said,

“No, I won’t go to her class–what can I learn from her, she is too young.”the fabulous Brigitte

I sure am glad I didn’t have that attitude when I first met her years ago.  The moment I met her, I knew she was someone I wanted to spend time with–see previous post: (https://naturegirltara.wordpress.com/2010/04/30/a-magical-age-25/)

At the same time, I can understand his sentiment because I too have  held this belief at times. My belief was a bit scattered and depended on what the subject was.  Here I am, a woman who has already seen so much in life, experienced far more because of the extra years I’ve lived, yet–

I strive to find ways around that limiting belief–to stay open to as many people and paths I cross–regardless of their age.IMG_0795

Years ago even when Brigitte  had just begun teaching–I was simply going to be a support for her as a teacher. Yet, every time I attended her class, I always experienced some kind of  illumination that thrilled me.  It was always a loving, healing experience for me.  Brigitte will say a phrase that can tap you into your own spirit in an instant.  Her spirit and energy alone, are worth your time.

My personal yoga practice has been going on for about 15 years–just because someone is new to teaching doesn’t mean there aren’t  things I can learn from them!

Brigitte has been teaching for more than a few years now and as time has gone on, I see that I have learned more than I was even aware of at the time.  brigitte takes a breath

I still think about the interaction with the friend that is close to my age.  I can’t help but think of the confucius saying–“he who thinks he knows it all has a lot to learn”.  It’s not that he thinks he knows it all, it’s just that he thinks he knows more than her because she’s so much younger.

Don’t let those narrow-minded beliefs cut you off from amazing people that  just happen to be younger than you!

As I reflect on how Brigitte has affected my life, I’m pretty blown away at the things I’m doing today that she is responsible for.  She urged me to start writing this blog.  I vividly remember the day–we had just completed a gorgeous hike.  We sat together  and she helped me form my first words in my first post!  Who knows how long it would have taken me without her guidance.

When I met her, I had just ended a 20 year marriage that had me pretty darn isolated!

Brigitte has opened up my world in ways that were so necessary for my growth as a person and in my profession.   She really helped me to see the power of being involved in community and in creative collaborations of all kinds. I’ve since started my own Meetup.com hiking group and have met and remain friends with so many amazing people who I’ve met through that group.my meetup hike

Brigitte has organized and led workshops on various topics–one of my favorites was

The Artist’s Way Workshop.

A group of women met for 12 consecutive weeks practicing the  topics together as a  support system for one an other.  It was a powerful process and Brigitte is a myriad of things to me and to the people who know her–she is a nature lover, she seeks out adventure and wonder, and she is a master facilitator on so many topics regarding personal growth and finding ways to claim the life we were meant to live.  She has been invaluable to so many charities throughout Los Angeles  that empower children through creativity and the performing arts.IMG_0519

As a yoga teacher, Brigitte’s classes have always evolved.

She is the consummate professional–she has a sense about her and she knows how to address whatever your needs may be.

Emotionally, she has that same sense.  She can tap into what you may have locked away for years and get you looking at it and responding to it.

If you have the chance to attend a class here in the Santa Monica area or even travel with Brigitte to a far away yoga retreat–take it!

The chance for an intensive week of that “Gigi Yogini” energy should rock your world in ways you can’t even imagine now!brigitteandtaraTREE

 Visit http://www.GigiYogini.com for the latest schedules and updates.

Dig Deep–I Am That

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We stood above a waterfall on the trail. Huge boulders were nuggets in a stream. A tree stuck out among the rocks–its roots looked as if they were going into the rock but they simply went beyond the boulder and into the ground. Another tree had huge thick roots that stuck out above the stream.

All you need to do is stop and look around in nature, nature leaves clues. Everything really does always work out for us!

Nature abounds with continuous proof of abundance!

Tree roots never give up, they always seek to grow. It doesn’t matter if they have to force their way through boulders and rocks, they dig deep and get connected.
If there’s no more room to dig deep, they puff up above the surface and grow that way. Whichever way they can, they’re growing. Trees really do amaze us. Some of them have been around for hundreds of years and have seen and heard so much. Imagine…

I guess they set an example for us humans. How are you growing? Are you growing? Reaching? Digging deep? Sometimes contentment and complacency set in and we no longer strive. To strive and be a bit out of balance is where the thrill of life shakes us up and thrusts us forward. Those trees inspired me today, I will reach higher and deeper than I have before. Life is calling me out into it–I just need to trust it and reach!

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Just a Reminder…

Hiking Los Angeles, Malibu, Santa Monica Mountains

Are you an artist?  I think you are but you may not know it.  We think it has to look a certain way.  I am an artist.  For many years though, I never saw myself as an artist.  As I sit here observing my surroundings and the people in my midst, I know without a doubt, we are all artists.

I remember when I met my singer/songwriter friend Chantal Kreviazuk for the first time, I didn’t know what she did in the world,  I asked her,  “what do you do”?  She replied, “I AM AN ARTIST”.

I liked the way that sounded and it really stood out to me.  Still, I didn’t know what kind of artist.  Being an artist is a broad category and it can look any way we see it.

For her, she doesn’t have to think about being an artist, she just IS.  She was a…

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Dilapidated Dreams

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Have you ever driven by a business that was once thriving and now it is dilapidated because of neglect?  In your memory,  it was busy and successful– the place was always maintained with the utmost care and cleanliness; there were  customers bustling in and out  and it was alive and thriving.  Then, years later, you drive by to see an establishment that has been abandoned.

That’s what happened today when I drove by the old Chevron station in Malibu.  It is now infused with weeds, cracked cement, and an old wire fence surrounding it.  The sight of it just hit me really hard.

I guess what  moved me was that it can be a metaphor for our lives, our health, and our dreams.

Unfortunately, some people do this very thing with their  health–they just stop the upkeep.  They decide to just let it go and discontinue maintenance of the premises.

The sight of this was so dramatic.  Honestly, health is one thing that I do maintain, but what about my dreams?  I have caught myself saying “I used to want to be…” a lot.  I’ve said that phrase  several times within the last year.

I admit, I have let some of my goals and dreams grow wild with weeds.  The weeds represent my doubts, my fears, my inaction.

I’ve noticed a trend in how I handle life and success.  It seems that once I reach what I’d wanted, I become a little complacent, stagnant.    It’s almost like I want to rest awhile before I start striving again.  It’s usually during that rest and relaxation that depression sets in because I’m not keeping up with my new desires.

Perhaps it was all the years I spent in college that conditioned me to strive and take a break once I achieved a thing.  As one of my favorite teachers, Abraham-Hicks, says “reach and find balance”.  I think I’ve been spending too much time at the balance point and then level off there for a bit too long.

Because I’ve been pondering these thoughts, people and circumstances have been showing up for me in a synchronistic way.  The other day, as  I was riding one of my favorite mountain biking trails in Malibu,  I met a rider who exhibited such skill and confidence.  It turns out, he is a former pro down hill rider.

He was just so masterful and playful. 

It seems like he was in my space to show me that there’s always another level to get to.  There are no words to describe his skill and ability–I was utterly amazed at what I saw.  No, I don’t want to ride with that kind of gusto because it is amazingly fast and dangerous, but it was just an indication that there is always room to grow and improve.  There is always more to learn–a higher level to reach.

On the opposite end of that, I have a girlfriend who truly inspires me.  She grew up and never learned how to ride a bike.  Now, after all these years of owning that fact, she is now stepping into the truth of what is possible–she has taken on learning how to ride a bike. 

I met up with her yesterday to ride our bikes together.  It was her 3rd or 4th time on the bike.  She knows she looks like a beginner but, honestly, she is so full of grace as she loses balance or has to stop suddenly.

She is  reaching beyond what she’s always been and silencing her ego.  She will not stay in that place.  Her courage is so inspiring to me.

What showed up for me next was a Joel Osteen  sermon.

Joel Osteen is one speaker I love listening to.  His words spoke directly to how I’ve been feeling.

Joel says, “One of the battles we all have to fight is the battle of containment.  The enemy doesn’t want you to go any further.  He can’t do anything about the ground that you have already gained, he’ll give you that.  But what he doesn’t want is for you to advance.  His goal is to keep you contained.  That’s why it can be very difficult to press through to a new level.  There are forces working overtime to try to keep us where we are.  Many people are too easily satisfied…instead of stretching and believing in bigger things they get stuck.”

The reference to “he”,  for me, is the ego.  The ego doesn’t want us to grow and stretch, it wants things to be just as they are–no growth, just comfortable contentment.

The ego has a hard time with not being good enough.  Trudging through all the pain and humiliation of achieving a new level of skill or taking on something totally new is far too much for the ego.   There is a lot to learn and it will take time to gather the skills.  That’s why the two extremes of my new friend Gary (the pro) and my girlfriend (the beginner) speak volumes to me.  In each case, it really takes something to get to a new level.

Joel’s words were just what I needed.

Fear has been presenting itself to me often these days.

There are new career endeavors I’d like to venture into, but I seem to be stopped by fear.  When you’ve been in one field for most of your life, the thought of  even claiming you can be something else is daunting.  But since the new career I want to embark upon is in the creative realm,  I just need to step into it.

There isn’t any formal education I need to apply for, I just need to be it in my mind first, then I will be it in the world.

Sounds easy!  In reality FEAR is false–False Expectations Appearing Real.

Yes indeed, it’s time to take on bigger and better dreams and turn them into reality.  Where I am is not where I’m going to stay.  Yes, I’m proud of what I’ve achieved so far, but there is always more thrill.  The thrill really does come from reaching for something greater, becoming more than I once was, and finding balance in that new place.   Inspiration has shown itself to me and I do believe I have some weeding to do!

I Am An Artist

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Are you an artist?  I think you are but you may not know it.  We think it has to look a certain way.  I am an artist.  For many years though, I never saw myself as an artist.  As I sit here observing my surroundings and the people in my midst, I know without a doubt, we are all artists.

I remember when I met my singer/songwriter friend Chantal Kreviazuk for the first time, I didn’t know what she did in the world,  I asked her,  “what do you do”?  She replied, “I AM AN ARTIST”.

I liked the way that sounded and it really stood out to me.  Still, I didn’t know what kind of artist.  Being an artist is a broad category and it can look any way we see it.

For her, she doesn’t have to think about being an artist, she just IS.  She was a child prodigy and was playing piano at the age of 3 and writing songs not long after.

For her, being an artist is just what she’s always been. 

There was no sense of doubt or question in her answer, that was clear.

I remember thinking, “wow, I wish I had that knowing and could proclaim it with the same kind of certainty.”

Years have gone by since that initial meeting and I’ve often thought about the words and the sentiment surrounding that exchange.  I’ve seen that, in fact, Chantal is an artist.

I’ve been to her concerts, seen her interviews, witnessed the causes and charities she is passionate about, seen her with her husband and her children, met many of her fans, etc.  She is an artist in her work but also in life.

Thoughts are creative and the beliefs that come from those thoughts continue to create.

Chantal was fortunate enough to formulate powerful beliefs at an early age.

Unfortunately, for most of us, we’ve decided that only a select few are artists.

If we weren’t told we were creative or artistic, we learn to believe we aren’t. 

If we weren’t fortunate enough to be a child prodigy, we seem to chalk it up to our fate or lack thereof.

I include this information about Chantal, not to make you feel inferior or “not enough”, but If we could get out of our own way, the answers to our connection and creativity could flow.

There are so many people in my life who are extremely creative.  At times, I am intimidated and feel I don’t measure up.  One of my friends is on fire with the creative projects she is taking on.  I’ve decided though, instead of comparing myself to her and feeling  “less than”, I’m going to take it as a sign.  The sign I choose to see is this:  I am vibrating a frequency that is attracting creative people into my life.  They are here to show me that I, too, am creativity in action!

As I watch the world go by, I see that we’re all artists.  We create with our thinking and that is the ultimate artistry.  We should start claiming with clarity and ownership, “I am an artist!”

We should all begin to step into the sentiment of being artists with confidence.  Whether or not we have been in the past, we should know the simplicity of our creative minds.  Thinking is creative.  If that is true, imagine how artistic we are.

Let’s get to it.  There is no comparing ourselves to others allowed.   What will you create?   I am an artist.  You are an artist.  It’s time to create!

Speaking of creating, the following interview with Chantal is the amazing story of how her career began.  You won’t want to miss this!  You will want to watch all 4 parts I’m sure,  in part 2 she performs the song that launched her career!)

Chantal is a Canadian born, award winning singer/songwriter.  Not only does she record her own albums but she collaborates with other artists to write their songs…Avril Lavigne, Kelly Clarkson, and Gwen Stefani, just to name a few. Her songs have been featured in numerous movie and television soundtracks.  Chantal is a true inspiration and fun to watch and listen to!

CHECK OUT PART 1 OF THE 4 PART INTERVIEW

Part 2 

Part 3

Part 4

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